|
Pinings: BYO-BFF
by Sherry Hughes sah103@hotmail.com
Dear Sherry,
Two of my friends started dating each other a couple of months ago. I’ve been friends with the guy, who I’ll call Guy, longer than the girl, who I’ll call Girl. Guy has had periodic problems with alcoholism. He stops drinking for a while, but has never managed to stay sober for more than 6 months at a time. He’s truly a wonderful man, but he is also caught up in addiction. I don’t even answer the phone when he calls if he’s drinking (I check my caller ID) because I can’t deal with him. He gets drunk and starts ranting and there is no talking to him.
I told Girl about this issue of Guy’s …which felt like the right thing to do. I don’t know if she didn’t believe me or what, but a couple of weeks into their relationship, she came to me and said, “he’s not just an alcoholic, he’s a horrible drunk!” Clearly, she didn’t know what I meant when I talked to her. Now she isn’t sure she wants to continue dating him. She has asked me a couple of times what she should to and when he might stop.
What should I tell her?
Anna
Dear Anna,
I think you should stay out of it. She was warned about Guy’s issue and made a decision to give him a chance regardless. Now she’s in the muck and looking for someone to tell her how to get out. But you might be the recipient of some resentment if she, for example, decides to break things off with him on your advice and then he gets sober.
You did the right thing by telling her, the other decisions are on her.
Sherry Hughes welcomes letters from readers at sah103@hotmail.com
Comments? Thoughts? Discuss this article and more at hippoflea.com
|
Navigation
